I come from the before-moms-went-to-work generation, so
keeping house is what my mother did. She
was damn good at it, still is at 84. At my house, on any given day, you could
eat a meal off the floor of your choosing. During the deep cleaning rituals of spring
and fall, this perpetual state of spotlessness reached a new threshold. They
are scrubbed clean slivers of time that I remember well. It’s also something I
couldn’t imitate if you threatened to dunk my head in a bucket of bleach. On
those two days of the year, we’d come through the front door to a nose full of
Windex, every Electrolux attachment on duty, and Mother poised on a step
ladder. She wasn’t wearing pearls, but she surely wouldn’t have stood in front
of an open window without makeup on or her hair done. By the time we got home,
she’d worked her way to the changing of the curtains—kind of like the changing
of the guard, only more formal. Years removed, the memory of that gold-tweed
fabric evokes the crisp scent of fall, the same way a blooming cherry tree
makes me think of bright white sheers. We had beautiful curtains (Mother sewed
them all) along with Sunday roast beef dinners and a no-nonsense, “Drink some orange juice, go to school,
you’ll feel better,” approach to life. It wasn’t the touchy-feely, my kids are the center of universe, attitude
we often see today, but it did manage to get my sisters and me to here.
Bayport, New York, circa 1965. Cherry tree, pre-blossom. |
Mother and I are not kindred spirits, which is not a
problem, just the way it is. We get along fine, but it isn’t the relationship I
have with my daughters. Although, on the right day, my daughters would probably
tell you that we don’t see eye-to-eye on everything either. Bill O’Reilly,
Nicholas Sparks novels, tiny china teacups and pantyhose are just a few of the
things that I can’t get my mind around. Mother, on the other hand, takes
exception to my lackadaisical politics, supersize glasses of wine, and often
crass sense of humor. Here, however, is where
we sync perfectly: when I think of the way Mother kept house, I think of the
way I write. Cleaning was just a broad term for every minute task that went
into the maintenance of her home. She would purge and polish, refresh and
review with a relentless eye. Dinner was an event, complete with an ironed
tablecloth, dessert included, served precisely at 5:30 p.m. on weeknights. On
summer Tuesdays the wash hung outside and on Thursdays bathrooms were scrubbed
clean—period. Mother did everything she could to make her space—our space—the
absolute best it could be. Admittedly, the book writing process is not Mother’s
forte, why it takes so long, or why I invest insane amounts of time writing,
researching, editing and rewriting. I mean, seriously, isn’t the wash piling up
somewhere? But I do have an answer when she questions my all-consuming nature,
a dogged insistence on my optimal performance. I remind Mother, “I’m only doing
exactly what you taught me.”
Laura Spinella is the author of the award-winning novel, BEAUTIFUL DISASTER and the upcoming novel, PERFECT TIMING. Visit her at www.lauraspinella.net.
What a sweet, nostalgic piece, Laura. Your mother must be proud of your attention to detail...even if it is when writing rather than cleaning! (Much better investment of time!)
ReplyDeleteThanks, Lori! Well, I think she'd also prefer that my house was spotless! But she seems to have accepted the compromise! Thanks for reading!
DeleteHow I remember those floors! And the perfectly coiffed, always neat, always gracious mother. I assumed that was her inner self shining; instead, my father was the white-glover, the one whose military self required perfection. At 85, my mother remains gracious, lovely, invariably polite, and she still loves to arrange flowers and surround herself with beauty, but she was never quite so rigidly immaculate after my father left. And, honey, if detritus piles around me because I'm writing? Well, I may wish for the cleaning demon to hit, but I'll be much more likely to put on blinders.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like your mother and mine have much in common, and are definitely of the same generation! And yes, I can relate to the flower arranging too!!
DeleteLaura, I love this post! Your mother sounds like a wonderful woman. Thanks for putting a smile on my face this morning :)
ReplyDeleteAh, Maria, I shall show Mother your comment later! She will be flattered! Thanks for reading!
ReplyDeleteLaura,
ReplyDeleteMy mother also kept a spotless home. I often look around at the piles of clutter, breeding dust-bunnies, and loads of toys and well--*sigh*. But then I remember that she didn't also practice law and write two thousand words a day--this rationalization keeps me semi-sane. Thank you for the lovely post.
xoMaggie
Glad you enjoyed it, Maggie! Of course, I don't know if my dust bunnies are as excusable. I didn't get the law degree!! (-;
ReplyDeletefabulous, Laura!
ReplyDeleteLove this!
ReplyDelete