Yes, we're talking about our favorite author sites, and I promise I'll get to that in a minute.
But first, what the heck time is it?
It’s a semi-annual (does that mean twice a year? Or is it biennial?) struggle. My brain simply will not handle it. Spring forward, fall back, yes, I understand that part. Every fall and spring we change the clocks here on the east coast in order to—what? Make it lighter in the morning and darker sooner? Whatever. I just can’t comprehend it.My brain has fogged over this issue for years. I once anchored the weekend news in Atlanta, where we also switched to daylight savings. (Or something.) The weather guy turned to me on the anchor desk, and said, all serious, “Remember, Hank, this is the night the time changes.”
I looked at him, narrowing my eyes. “Well, actually.” I said. “The time doesn’t really change. The time stays the same. It’s a continuum, and the time just keeps relentlessly going. But WE change. We change the clocks. But the time, well, that stays the same.”
The next Monday I got called into the General Manager’s office. What was that time stuff all about? he asked. He was not happy. I tried to explain the time continuum to him, but he did not care.
“Listen,” he said. “That was ridiculous.”
(And then he said, and I promise you this is a direct quote.) “You’re gonna have to practice your ad libs.”
It’s not just the clock change thing that flummoxes me. It’s time zones.
There was the time my cat was at the vet. I was supposed to call the vet by 6 pm to get the update on Lola’s condition. But there had been breaking news, and by the time I was off the air, it was past 6.
Rats, I thought. I’ve missed talking to the vet. But then, I realized I had a solution. I thought “My boyfriend is in California. And there it’s only 3 pm! So HE could call!”
It took me a few moments to realize the flaw in that.
And now , today, we change the clocks. At least, some of them. I’m even more completely confused, because the automatic clocks, the ones connected to the computer and the cable TV, change themselves. (Don’t they? What time is it now, anyway?) The battery-operated one in my bathroom and the antiquated one on the oven, I have to change myself.
But then there was the year that my husband changed all the clocks. But I didn’t know that. So I decided to change them, too. Which I did. So that made us two hours off. Behind. Or ahead. Or maybe we were the same.
I have no idea.
Is this a problem of Einsteinian proportions? Or is it just me?
************I promised author sites.
Ah, yes, The Lipstick Chronicles. http://www.thelipstickchronicles.blogspot.com/
Jungle Red Writers. http://www.jungleredwriters.com/ And Femmes Fatales. http://femmesfatales.typepad.com/
I say this, not only because they are powerhouse sites with amamzing authors, but because I am lucky enough to be part of them. And if you check them out--I'll give away a free book from among the commenters! Just mention the Girlfriends...see all the perks you get from being here?
Other faves:
http://1stturningpoint.com/?page_id=7 Terrific and smart promo tips
http://meanderingsandmuses.blogspot.com/ Everyone who's anyone in mystery and thriller world.
There are SO many more--which ones do YOU love?
(And oh! PEROOZAL! Listen, anyone who is an author, you MUST check this out. http://www.peroozal.com/ Getting in on the ground floor is a must--it's still in beta testing. Check it out, email me. You'll love it.)
