Author Talk Disasters: Don't Let These Happen To You

Since publication of my novel I have been invited to speak to book clubs, literary guilds, and library groups. The Writer’s League of Texas Annual Agents and Editors Conference invited me to serve on their faculty where I offered a breakout session and participated on a panel discussion.  Although my talks generally went well, there were some glitches I could have avoided with a little more planning and attention to detail.  I've provided the humiliating details below to save you from making the same mistakes.  

It’s The Book, Stupid.  During one author talk I had gone on for 40 minutes, sacrificing my husband and children for a laugh, baring my rejection history for a little sympathy, and explaining how my creative technique evolved from watching Gilligan’s Island as a kid, when someone raised their hand.  Normally, I love questions but this person asked:  What is your book about? 

My book?  MY BOOK!

I told her.  And then I went home and wrote on my note cards:  FIRST: TELL THEM WHAT THE BOOK IS ABOUT!!!

Surprise!!  I was once the surprise entertainment at a surprise birthday party for a woman turning 80 who belongs to four book clubs.  So when her surprise party organizers introduced me (the surprise entertainment) it should have come as no surprise that she wasn’t surprised.  When you hang with four book clubs there is a good chance you’ve heard the local authors.  Fortunately for the birthday girl, I never give the same talk twice.  While this means I don't have the smooth delivery of someone who works from memory, at least in this case she did not have to spend her 80th birthday party sitting through a talk she’d already heard.       

Avoid Wardrobe Malfunction.  Probably a good idea to have someone look over your attire before presenting yourself to a roomful of people just in case you are wearing a new black skirt with a slit in the back that is still stitched together with the white thread the factory uses to sew giant cross hatches so big everyone can see them from across a wide auditorium, with or without their glasses.

Don’t Assume Anything.  An acquaintance invited me to speak to her book club.  While I arrived on time with my fresh talk, my host was called away and remained oddly absent through most of the event.  And she was not there to sort things out when, seated around a large table, having just made my introductory remarks, things went terribly wrong.  One of the guests took over the discussion.  And she took control with such authority, changed the subject to other books, and proceeded to lead without ever allowing me or my Author Talk back in.  I found myself wondering if I was indeed the featured speaker.  Was I on the right planet?  Could these people see me?  I maintained a graceful exterior but when I got home I wrote myself another note:  DON'T FORGET TO ASK if you are the featured speaker.   

Don't Quit Your Day Job.   Book talks and signings are part of the Author Package, the life-after-publication dreams that begin once the book contract is signed.  If you publish a book, groups will invite you to speak and speak and speak.  And while speaking is fun, it will eat into your precious writing time just like other promotional activities including blogs, Facebook, twitter, etc.  Although I love all aspects of the writing job, I try not to get too carried away with the extra stuff, reminding myself the thing that makes me actively happy and fulfilled is the act of writing.        

Do you have Author Talk Disasters to share?  Please do!

     

Cindy Jones is the author of My Jane Austen Summer, the story of a young woman who thinks she may have realized her dream of living in a novel when she is invited to participate in a Jane Austen Literary Festival.  Her problems follow her to England where she must change her ways or face the fate of so many of Jane Austen’s secondary characters, destined to repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

Visit me at my
website
Facebook
Twitter
Amazon    

Outting My Inner Child by Christa Allan

“Author John Green, who has penned a number of acclaimed Young Adult novels, puts it this way: “Writing is something you do alone. It’s a profession for introverts who want to tell you a story, but don’t want to make eye contact while doing it.”   From the blog, A New Fiction Writers Forum, “Why Introverts Make Good Writers”

Image from SideOut Foundation

CGBlake, author of the blog, shares a sentiment widely expressed by others, which is most writers would call themselves introverts. For many of these writers, being asked to speak publicly is about as appealing as pole dancing on Bourbon Street.

I am not one of those writers (though pole dancing would be a totally humiliating experience for me mostly because, with my lack of grace and athletic ability, I’d have a head injury in less than twenty seconds).

Our topic du jour is authors in the public forum, and after spending 25 years teaching high school English, I’m not uncomfortable being the target of thirty or more sets of eyeballs. Over the years, I developed my teacher “with-it-ness” to recognize when their eyes looked like glazed donuts.

But teaching and sometimes (often?) entertaining teens is far less intimidating for me than presenting to my peers. It’s not so much the being “on stage” as it is attempting to be the “sage on stage” while I’m there. I’m eager to volunteer to give workshops or attend conferences for the opportunity to meet readers and/or other writers. Then, when I arrive and find myself in the company of well-respected agents/editors and writers whose books are NYT bestsellers, my inner child has a wee panic attack.

I wonder, even after having written five novels, what I could say that would be share-worthy because I don’t feel like I’m there yet. That there place where everyone else who’s found recognition must hang out and have lavish parties and chocolate-induced comas.

So, I remind myself that I’ll never be there unless I’m here first. Challenging myself to grow as a writer means being willing to fall off the pole and to trust that the people I meet will catch me.

_____________________________________________________

You can find Christa at www.christaallan.com, Facebook, and Twitter. She and her husband live in  New Orleans with their three neurotic cats and new dog Herman who eats Magic Erasers, bras and jeans. Test of Faith, Christa's latest novel, released in March.

My Favorite Audience – 6 year-olds by Ariella Papa

This cycle we are talking about authors in public forums. I happen to have a lot of experience with this.

Almost three years ago I cofounded a reading series called Authors Unbound. It’s the only reading series dedicated to independent authors and providing events for them to share their work. I’m happy that AU exists in the world and if you are an indie author or you are looking for a fun night of lit, drinks and cookies please check out Authorsunbound.org.

However my favorite public forum was something unexpected. Last year my son’s first grade teacher asked me to come in and speak to a group of thirty young writers who were doing a fiction unit. I was probably more nervous about this then any other reading or author talk.

I started with a question that I was sure they would know the answer to: “How many of you want to be writers when you grow up?” About a quarter of the hands shot up. I nodded. Of course they were certain.  I believe it’s something you know right away. I loved seeing that confidence. It doesn’t exist always in adults. Sometimes you ask someone who has published several books if they’re a writer and they hesitate.

The teacher took out one of my earlier books. Several of the kids actually “oohed”. I may have blushed. It was amazing.

I spoke for a bit about the life of a writer trying not to edit yourself and making time to write. I said things that I would say to anyone who wanted to be an author but I really appreciated that these kids weren’t jaded at all. It reminded me about all my dreams when I was that age. I had no idea about all the hardships. I just wanted to be a writer and believed that anything was possible.

But by far the best part of the talk was that I had one person I really wanted to impress and he was beaming.

Ariella Papa’s most recent book is A Semester Abroad. The next Authors Unbound event is April 22 at Entwine NYC at 7pm.

Brainstorming: Good for Creative Writing, Not for 24/7 Cable News

by Wendy Tokunaga

Like most people I’ve been fascinated (and saddened) by the mystery of the Malaysian airliner that went missing on March 8. And I’ve also been intrigued by the speculation on exactly what might have happened. Because of the extraordinary situation and the fact that so much is unknown, 24/7 cable news outlets like CNN have been piling on the theories with little or no hard information to back them up. Suppositions and assumptions are the name of the game and ratings only increase as tantalizing new scenarios are pulled out of a hat.

Did the jet turn into a “ghost” or “zombie” plane? Was it struck by a meteor? Or what if it were sabotage by the pilot? After all, he had a flight simulator at home. Had he rehearsed this scenario weeks or months before? Was he in cahoots with terrorists who wanted to use the plane for nefarious purposes at a later time? Did he land the jet at a hidden airstrip in a top-secret location? What if the passengers were still alive but unable to contact loved ones?

And what about that mysterious phone call the pilot made right before the plane took off? He also had close ties with an opposition leader in Malaysia who had recently been arrested on a sodomy charge that could have been a frame-up by those currently in power. And what about the fact that his family moved out of their house the day before the incident? Did he have serious personal problems that led him to commit suicide and cause an intentional crash?

Or was he a hero? Did he divert that plane off course because of smoke or some other problem in the cockpit to get closer to where he could make an emergency landing? Did he fly at a lower altitude, not to avoid detection, but to try and save the lives of the passengers?

These theories and unanswered questions remind me of what I do when I’m brainstorming plot points, character motivations, conflicts and complications for a novel. I open up a document and write a series of “what if” and “why” questions. Then I’ll put it away and read it another day and add to the list. At this point nothing is too outlandish to delete; I just let my imagination run wild. Eventually I pare it down to something more focused and throw out what I don’t need. While it might not work for every writer, it’s what works for me.

I’m not so sure it works well for the news. And, of course, I’m dealing with fiction.

Girlfriends, do you use brainstorming techniques when you write your novels? Do you think there’s a place for theorizing on the news?

Find me at:

Twitter: @Wendy_Tokunaga

Facebook

My Website

A Few Of My Favorite Things...

So yesterday - Sara had this great list of books she loves. And that made me think that I should do the same...mainly because hey! I like books! And I have opinions! Why not?

So here are a few of my favorite books that you SHOULD read if A) You have my weird sense of humor and B) Have nothing else to do:

LET'S PRETEND THIS NEVER HAPPENED: A Mostly True Memoir, by Jenny Lawson:



Best book ever written. If you like to laugh. Jenny writes about everything from taxidermied Hamlet mice to important turkey documents. The most important book you'll ever read. Ever.

UNICORN WESTERN! 1-4, by Johnny Truant & Sean Platt:



My favorite series. The authors were told by their publisher that if they ever did an historical novel, they'd have to do tons of research first. "Not if we do a unicorn western!" Was their reply. And then they wrote them. It's a futuristic western where the marshall rides a smart-assed talking unicorn. What's not to love?  I've only read 1-4 and they've since made more. Haven't read them yet but will!

THE SEX LIVES OF CANNIBALS: Adrift in the Equitorial Pacific, by J. Maarten Troost:



A book so funny you can barely get past the first page of each chapter. The story of a Dutch man who moves, with his government employed American girlfriend to the islands of Kiribati - this book had me laughing from the start. No explicit sex, even though the title somewhat implies it. Totally worth it though.

So there you have it - my list of must-reads.

Go forth and enjoy!

Leslie Langtry

A Few of My Favorite Books

by Sara Rosett

The sleuth in my cozy mystery series, Ellie Avery, is a professional organizer and is inordinately fond of lists. While I’m not an organizer, I do love to make lists. And, what could be better than a list about books?

So here is a random sampling of some of my favorite books.


Favorite Children’s Book: The Secret Garden

Favorite Mystery Series: The Good Thief’s Guide series

Favorite New Non-Mystery: Where Did You Go, Bernadette? by Maria Sample

Favorite Agatha Christie: The Moving Finger

Favorite Jane Austen: Sense and Sensibility

Favorite Thriller: At Risk by Stella Rimington

Favorite Romance: Pink Carnation series by Lauren Willig

 


Favorite Re-read: Austenland by Shannon Hale

What about you? What books make your favorite things list? 


When not avidly searching for new favorite reads, Sara writes a cozy mystery series (Ellie Avery series) and a suspense series with a dash of romance (On the Run series). As a military spouse Sara has moved around the country (frequently!) and traveled internationally, which inspired her latest suspense series. Publishers Weekly called Sara’s books, "satisfying," "well-executed," and "sparkling."

Sara loves all things bookish, considers dark chocolate a daily requirement, and is on a quest for the best bruschetta. Connect with Sara at www.SaraRosett.com or sign up for her newsletter list here. You can also find her on Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, or Goodreads.

Writing tips: if you show me yours, I'll show you mine…. by Brenda Janowitz

This cycle on the Girlfriends Book Club, we're talking about writing conferences. But, true confession time: I've never been to one! It's not because I don't want to. I think a conference could be a great experience. Hanging out with other writers, meeting agents and editors, what could be bad? But with two small children at home, I just haven't been able to find the time.

I bet there's a lot of you like me out there. So, let's make our own little writers conference.  If I share some of my writing tips, will you share yours?!  I'll go first:



Keep writing! It’s so easy to get discouraged or feel like you don’t have the time to write. But like anything else that is important in life, you have to work at it and make the time for it.


This is the advice I give to every writer I meet.  There will always be excuses to avoid writing-- I have no free time, I have little kids, I have big kids, I don't have kids yet, my job is too demanding, I need to find a job...  you fill in your own.  If writing is really your dream, make the time.  Start with a writing class, and then find a writer's group.  Once you commit to taking the time to write, you'll be able to find the time to put pen to paper.  (Or fingers to keyboard, as the case may be.)



Edit! Editing your work is almost as important as the writing itself. Sure, you’re telling your story, but it’s also important to consider the way that you tell it. You want your writing to be tight, elegant and polished. It can only get to be that way through careful and thorough editing.




Develop a very thick skin. You’re putting yourself out there when you write and not everyone is going to love what you do. But that’s okay! You’re not writing to please everyone out there. You’re writing because you have a story that you want to tell. So start getting used to criticism and then see tip #1—keep writing!


Now, I've told you my best writing tips.  What are some of yours?

I’m the author of SCOT ON THE ROCKS and JACK WITH A TWIST. My third novel, RECIPE FOR A HAPPY LIFE, was published by St. Martin's on July 2, 2013. My fourth novel, THE LONELY HEARTS CLUB, will be published by Polis Books on May 6, 2014.

My work’s also appeared in the New York Post and Publisher’s Weekly. You can find me at brendajanowitz.com or on Twitter at @BrendaJanowitz.